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Anger as Fuel

Reddit:

Anger can be an amazing fuel. Everything big that I’ve accomplished has been fueled by anger/resentment. The best revenge is a life well lived. However, if you’re not going to make your resentment useful, you should let it go because it is just making your life worse. It’s not hurting the person you are angry at. It’s just hurting you.

I’ve found that forgiving the person I’m angry at (and forgiving myself) is the only way to get ride of my anger. That doesn’t mean you trust that person again. Learn the lessons you can from the experience. After you’ve learned, let it go and forgive them. You forgive someone for you, not for them.

And:

I backpack and hike till Im tired, and because I know Im really alone I “talk” to the trees and just figure out why I’m angry. If I can’t hike I’ll do that on long drives. Just figure myself out and ask if that energy is worth it.

You know it’s bad when you run to the woods!

And:

I let it out. I angrily clean, I furiously work out, I have an angry conversation with an imaginary person/vent, I throw my pillow at the wall.

Then I think about what or who I am angry at. If it’s a person, I think about what they did or said and why it made me so angry and then I ask myself if it’s something I need to approach them about or if it’s some thing that isn’t worth getting into. I think, will being angry at them help me? When I’m calmer, will I feel guilty about getting so angry? I ask if it will matter in a few years.

Going through that mental checklist usually helps me calm down and sort out some priorities. If it’s something that I can talk to someone about and maybe find a solution, then I’ll approach the person when I feel calmer. If it’s some thing that I know no amount of talking will fix, or they won’t be receptive to it, then I decide how important it is to me. If it’s some thing that I can live with and let go, I let it go.

The important thing is that anger doesn’t turn into resentment. Because that just is a waste of energy and makes you incredibly bitter. If I’m angry, I tell myself that I’m angry and then I decide if its worth it.

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Emotional Cash

Reddit:

Quite a few years ago, I had an intensive half-day session with a therapist to discuss a bunch of things I was going through at the time and we touched on some anger/frustration issues I was experiencing with my Mum.

The therapist asked me whether, in my general life, I was wasteful or prudent with money. I told her that by and large, I was risk-averse, and not prone to frittering away my hard-earned dollars. She then said something incredibly profound: Me holding onto my anger and frustration with my mother was resulting in me ending my days emotionally in the red, because I was frittering away all my “emotional cash” on reacting to her. I could either continue to allow her to drain me of my reserves, or I could choose to actively let go of my natural reaction to her behaviour. If I chose the former, I’d continue to end my days in the red; if I chose the latter, I’d be that much richer emotionally from having just let it go.

It’s a lesson I’ve not forgotten and in fact, have applied it to many other people and situations since. ?

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About Anger

Reddit:

A few things will help – one is to understand where anger comes from. Anger is very useful because it shows you where your needs have not been met. It is usually hiding a deep sadness or fear.

It is the thought you tell yourself about the unfairness or disrepect of the situation that is making you angry, not the situation itself – this means that something happened where your need was not met… Ask yourself what was that? Was it safety, being listened, respected or loved? etc….

When this happened or you think about it again, another thought flashes into your mind that says it was unfair or horrible BECAUSE………… and this is what is making you angry.

You can use this anger to have your needs met in the future. It might be a good idea to find a safe and super private place where you can SCREAM and let it all out, and punch a bunch of pillows………… I’m not even joking! It will help.

Next thing, is to use the emotional freedom technique. Also called EFT Tapping. It is profound. I have tapped for thousands of hours on myself and with clients – because it words profoundly. I highly recommend you trying it. You can do it by yourself or you could follow along with youtube videos. Of course with most things like this it is best with a gifted practitioner, of which there are thousands of practitioners in The World now, so you will b able to find someone who resonates with you…

Rather than getting angry at yourself for getting angry – this makes it stick. There is a process used in eft, which I liken to emotional alchemy. When you accept you feel that way, let it move through you, express it, lean towards it, understand it AND send it love – you will shift the feeling. If you want to know more feel free to PM me, moving emotion through is one of my greatest passions because not many people know how to do it properly. But it’s actually real easy….

But truly, the only way out is through. So find that safe place to accept your anger and let it out, while focusing on what need wasn’t met and you might eventually find yourself in tears. This is healthy and will also pass, but don’t fight it. It is trapped energy aand crying and anger happens for a reason.

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Get Grateful

Reddit:

You want to let go? Get grateful. Angel was and is grateful for everything in her life. There were even moments when she was grateful for her step dad. She is the most amazing person I’ve ever known because despite everything, she chose gratitude, happiness, and love.

For myself, I truely forgave my brother by finding gratitude, appriciation, and understanding.

Be grateful you have lived your life and all that’s happened in it. And remember, you can always choose to smile.

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Retrain your brain to ‘not go there’

Reddit:

Thoughts and emotions are pathways, they become a habit and you need to work to retrain your brain to ‘not go there’. Its like quitting smoking or anything else, it takes work. Its like learning a new emotional language. It will take a while and you will have to make a solid effort to avoid thinking and dwelling on the negative but it can be done.

Don’t watch ‘downer’ movies or listen to much anger, don’t watch Jerry Springer and ease up on Fox news, ease up on heavy metal and dark music. Take in uplifting stuff, positive messages, motivational things. Get lots of exercise, do other things that will make you better, take a ceramics class or photography. Stay busy, don’t sit still, whenever it creeps in get up and do something else.

Yea it feels weird going out of your way trying to be happy, at first it feels like some sort of con of a joke, like your trying to trick yourself. Yea I miss my gothic music and my Slayer and the horror movies and all that but when you get all that out of your head (garbage in garbage out)

Listen to classical music, go for walks, volunteer at a homeless shelters, go out of your way to be nice to strangers, work at it and after a while your not faking it and one day you realize it’s become a self fulfilling prophecy.

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There Are No Others – Just You

Reddit:

You first need to understand that there are no others but you. It is your consciousness that gives life and animates your world. Without you nothing can exist. Therefore you should never be worry abt what “others” might say, they cannot say/think/do anything that you dont want them to say/think/do. If you assume “they” will judge you, Then guess what… Thats exactly what will happen. Remember: Assumptions harden into facts. I will leave a link because I think it could be helpful: https://www.iam-love.co/2019/08/10/everyone-is-you-pushed-out-life-is-a-dream/ ☺

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Revision & Forgiveness

exodusthree14:

You are innocent. You are whole and complete.

You are god.

Whatever happened was a dream. Stop fueling the fire now. Stop paying it more attention.

You are the new man now.

Nothing can touch you. Go and magnify the lord.

And:

I am the law of forgiveness. I am all forgiving grace. I am renewed and reborn. I am the water into wine. I am the resurrection and the life. I am the operant power. I Am my own salvation. I am grace. I am love.

Forgive yourself for thinking you were anything other than the glorious righteous loved son of God.

Forgive yourself for forgetting you live in the kingdom of heaven.

And:

You ARE forgiveness. You are it.

It’s done. Thank your Father.

Forgiveness is simply removing your attention from xyz.

There is no past, only states of consciousness. Cease telling some story you think happened 4!years ago (there is no time). You are holy and perfect. Go magnify the Lord.

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Neville Goddard – Revision

Neville Goddard, from ‘The Law And The Promise’:

Man and his past are one continuous structure. This structure contains all of the facts which have been conserved and still operate below the threshold of his surface mind. For him it is merely history. For him it seems unalterable — a dead and firmly fixed past. But for itself, it is living — it is part of the living age.

All memories live on somewhere in the mind – whether one consciously chooses to recollect this or not – therefore very important to correct unwanted memories.

Memory is imagination and imagination creates reality – in this respect, the past can live on and can influence the present – only absord yourself in memories that one wants to remember – correct the others

He cannot leave behind him the mistakes of the past, for nothing disappears. Everything that has been is still in existence. The past still exists, and it gives — and still gives — its results. Man must go back in memory, seek for and destroy the causes of evil, however far back they lie. This going into the past and replaying a scene of the past in imagination as it ought to have been played the first time, I call revision — and revision results in repeal.

You can change the past by imagining a different past because by imagining a different past you are creating different past. Changing your life means changing the past. The causes of any present evil are the unrevised scenes of the past.

The past and the present form the whole structure of man; they are carrying all of its contents with it. Any alteration of content will result in an alteration in the present and future.

Live nobly — so that mind can store a past well worthy of recall. Should you fail to do so, remember, the first act of correction or cure is always — “revise.”

To revise the past is to re-construct it with new content. Man should daily relive the day as he wished he had lived it, revising the scenes to make them conform to his ideals. For instance, suppose today’s mail brought disappointing news. Revise the letter. Mentally rewrite it and make it conform to the news you wish you had received. Then, in imagination, read the revised letter over and over again and this will arouse the feeling of naturalness; and imaginal acts become facts as soon as we feel natural in the act.

By mentally falsifying the facts of life, man moves from passive reaction to active creation; this breaks the wheel of recurrence and builds a cumulatively enlarging future.

The buried past usually lies deeper than our surface mind can plumb. It is to the pruning shears of revision that we owe our prime fruit.The whole is carrying all of its contents with it; any alteration of content will result in an alteration in the present and the future.

The first act of correction or cure is always “Revise.” If the past can be recreated into the present, so can the revised past. And thus the Revised Past appears within the very heart of her present life; not Fate but a revised past brought her good fortune.

As each day falls, mentally revise the facts of life and make them conform to events well worthy of recall; tomorrow will take up the altered pattern and go forward until at length it is realized on the heights of attainment.

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Revising Wide Swaths of Time

Reddit:

Well of course it feels like a lie right now. You gotta break it in like new shoes. Everything is an invention of the mind and it’s no more a lie than the ideas you fed on which resulted in the events to begin with. Because those ideas are habit, they seem true. Make new ideas habitual and they’ll seem true.

The reality is the past doesn’t exist anymore and memory is a fresh re-selection of a state that keeps your current identity stable.

So you have an attachment to an identity. The fact you note this is good because it shows awareness. It’s your decision now to stay attached to the identity if you want and keep manifesting things as they are OR you can make a decision to let that identify go. Simply making a decision and affirming it to yourself can be powerful. You can say to yourself“I’m ready to let it go and am choosing differently now”. You can manifest being someone who isn’t attached to the identity and then manifest a new identity.

Again – who you are now is a selection NOW. It’s a state you’re embodying now. Those memories are scenes you keep selecting and framing as defining events. They don’t comprise your entire past at all. There’s so much you didn’t select to repeat as your story and arguably you’ve give particular meaning to things that could just as easily be given a different meaning.

You don’t have to revise every experience in detail but you can choose different defining memories and reframe some to be more neutral if not positive. That’s often easier to do initially than a total wiping of a slate.

For instance I had a failed business with some rather, uh, unceremonious circumstances and bad blood… I didn’t revise the business succeeding because it’s not here now and I don’t want it to be. But I revised my feeling about it as a good learning experience, and I revised that the circumstances were peaceful and the people involved all moved on graciously. That was something I could feel real. It helped change my sense of failure to being someone who gets value and grows – it was a stepping stone, not a mistake.